82: The Discomfort Advantage: The Surprising Power of Leaning into Discomfort for Growth

Truth be told, none of us enjoy feeling uncomfortable. Whether it's giving difficult feedback, speaking up in a meeting, trying something new, or making a big life decision, our instinct is usually to avoid it.

But what if discomfort isn't something to try to escape? What if it's actually pointing you toward growth?

In this episode, I'm sharing why discomfort is one of the most underrated leadership (and life) skills you can develop. We'll talk about why your brain wants to keep you safe, how to recognize the physical signs of discomfort, and practical ways to move through it instead of letting it stop you.

If you've been waiting until you feel "ready," this episode is your reminder that courage usually comes first and then confidence follows.

In this episode, we'll talk about:

• Why discomfort is often a sign you're growing—not failing.
• The roller coaster analogy that changes the way you think about fear.
• What's actually happening in your brain and body when you feel uncomfortable.
• How to tell the difference between discomfort and danger.
• Simple ways to reframe fear as excitement.
• Why focusing on the outcome can make taking the first step easier.
• Brené Brown's reminder that you can't choose both courage and comfort.
• Everyday opportunities to practice getting more comfortable being uncomfortable.

Let’s keep the conversation going—connect with me on Instagram and LinkedIn, subscribe to my weekly newsletter, or reach out at hello@leadintoit.co. 

Excited to be with you!

Transcript

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You're listening to episode 82 of the Lead Into a Podcast. Hi, and welcome back to another episode of Lead Into It. I'm your host, Sarah Greco, and today we're going to talk about discomfort. And it might be uncomfortable, but I hope that you embrace it. So this has come out of a recent workshop that I gave, and I called it the Discomfort Advantage, which is also the title of this episode. And basically, we talk about discomfort, why it matters, and why it's probably an underrated skill that you can lean into instead of just staying in your comfort zone. So I hope that today you leave with a way to embrace that, those moments of discomfort and use it as an advantage to yourself as you're building in either leadership or a new phase that you're trying to enter upon, whether it's your career, life, however it is, this can be a skill that you lean into. And so first, I want to give you an analogy. Imagine you're on a roller coaster and you're in the very beginning part of it where you have the click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click. So the train roller coaster car is getting led up to probably the biggest hill of the ride. And that hesitation that you feel in those moments where you hear the click, click, click, it can create a feeling of discomfort or uncomfortability in your body somewhere. And you might feel it in your gut, in your shoulders, and your head, or you're like, crap, what did I do? And this keeps building and building and building and building. And you get higher and higher and higher. And then you reach the top of the hill. And there's a pause as the car just kind of goes over the edge a little bit and you hang out there for a second. And then you go. You go through the twist and turns and screaming as loud as you possibly can. The adrenaline is pumping and you're like, whoa, that was so cool. You get off the ride and you are just like, I'm so glad I did it. This was amazing. And maybe you're like, I want to do it again. If you do it again during that click, click, click, click, click, click, you might have a moment of hesitation, even knowing what's coming, but it might be a little bit less this time. I think roller coasters are such a good analogy for feeling that discomfort because whether you're giving presentation, you're giving feedback, you're going into these moments of uncomfortability. And in those moments, during the click, click, click, click moments, you have this buildup of being uncomfortable, even in your own body. And you're just like, my gosh, what am I doing? How am I doing this? What is it? And it's just, it's building and building and building the closer that you get to this moment where you have to embrace the discomfort. When you look at other people who are embracing discomfort, you might see them and be like, oh, they're so confident. What you don't see is in the background, they're probably embracing this discomfort as well. And how you go through the discomfort on the other side is where the growth is. Everyone always sees the other side. So it's after the roller coaster, feeling really good. It's after the speech. You see them feeling really good. Nobody talks about the moment before where you have to make the choice to go into the discomfort, really embrace it. It's like jumping into the deep end of a pool. You're like, should I jump? Should I not jump? Should I go on the roller coaster? I wonder if a lot of people were given the chance to get off at the top of the hill of roller coaster, how many people would? Because that feeling, your body is going against what your mind and you know what you want to do. It is that contradiction in your body where your body wants to stay comfortable. Your body's in survival mode. It wants to keep you safe. Same exact feeling happens during what might actually be safe scenarios, but your body's like, oh, this is scary. Public speaking. Most people are terrified of public speaking. So the moment of going on stage, of deciding to go do this, is embracing that discomfort. I can almost guarantee you will never not have that moment of discomfort. You will always feel some form of discomfort first entering that stage or giving that feedback. So my question to you is what do you do with that discomfort instead? Today we'll talk about some tools and resources to help you embrace that discomfort so that you can use it as a tool. You can use it as an advantage for yourself. So first, I want you to recognize the feeling. Think about a moment where you felt really uncomfortable, like you were about ready to enter a room and you're like, ooh, my body's saying, Let's get out of here. I don't want to do this. And maybe it is giving feedback is a good example, giving a presentation, making a decision that you've never had to make before, having a meeting that you've never had before. All these moments are moments of discomfort. And so what is that feeling that you have? Whether it's in your gut and it is kind of like butterflies, whether it's in your head and your mind is slightly spiraling a little bit as you're trying to figure this out, whether it's in your shoulders and you just feel your shoulders go up, what is that feeling for you? Identify it. That identification of it is going to be the most critical part of embracing your discomfort. Now, knowing that feeling, look at it and see when that comes up most for you. Public speaking is a common one, but know that before uncomfortable moments, you're going to have this feeling. It's just going to happen. This is where the change happens. You're going to reframe it. You're going to reframe it as some way of connecting to who you want to be on the other side of this discomfort. So on the other side of this roller coaster, who do you want to be on the other side of this? When you're having this feeling, maybe it's in your guide and you're just having this feeling of, oh, you're stepping into this room, you're stepping onto the stage, and you're like, okay, I recognize this feeling. I see what it's trying to do and it's trying to keep me safe. Now reframe that. I'm so excited to do this thing. I know that by taking this step, I am going to become who I want to be at the end of this. So if you're giving a tough piece of feedback that you really don't want to give to an employee, think about the result of it and how you'll feel after. I feel good that I gave this really piece of tough feedback because I know that this person will grow from that. And also I'll grow as a leader. And so you see where you're going to be after the roller coaster, after that moment of discomfort. And you're going to take that and embody that in that moment. So anytime you feel this feeling of uncomfortability and discomfort, recognize it and then reframe it and see the end of it. What is it going to be after? And you're going to take that feeling of after and use it because it's going to be hard to embrace that moment by just being uncomfortable. If you're just uncomfortable, you're just uncomfortable. What is the purpose of this discomfort, of this uncomfortability, and use that to your advantage? The other part is when you're having these moments of discomfort, count that as a moment where you're like, I'm going into the right place. I'm going in the right direction. Those moments of discomfort usually mean you're going into a moment of growth. If you are comfortable all the time, you're not growing. The moments of discomfort is when you're going to feel the most growth. Brenea Brown talks about this in many of her books, where really embracing courage over comfort. So embracing the discomfort is courageous. And that is more than just staying in your comfort zone. That is going to bring you more growth. So discomfort, you have to embrace that with courage. And on the other side of that is the growth that you'll feel. And this really isn't just a leadership skill. It can be used in any part of your life. So whether that's taking that trip that you've been scared to take, having that conversation with a friend that you don't want to have, but probably need to have, these are things that the more that you embrace the discomfort, the more practiced you'll feel, the more you'll recognize the feeling. And then you can embrace that feeling for what you want to be on the other side of it, what is on the other side of that roller coaster. So leaving here, my homework for you is when in the past have you felt those moments of discomfort where it's you're feeling that click-de-click and you want to get off this ride and you want to be just kind of stay in your comfort zone, stay on the couch, curl up in a blanket, hang out with your dog? What are those moments and where do you feel it in your body? Next, take that moment and look at what you received at the end of it. What was that growth moment? How did you have the courage to embrace the discomfort to get to the growth? What is that feeling? Take that feeling of what made you courageous and keep that in your back pocket for when you have these feelings of discomfort that you need to embrace. And take all of that for when you have these moments of discomfort because this can be a skill that you have. This can be a skill that you lean into. This isn't just being courageous, creating confidence, leaning into discomfort can help you more than a lot of other skills out there. Because it's not taught as a skill. It is taught as something you just need to push through. Well, instead of just pushing through it, you actually had a methodology for it. And really, when you embrace this discomfort, you're choosing the growth. The growth was never in the after, not the after the roller coaster, not in the after. It was always in the choosing, the choosing to embrace the discomfort. So if this episode stirred up something for you, a decision, a role, a conversation that maybe you've been avoiding, that's the exactly kind of the thing I work with in one-on-one coaching. And I would love to see if maybe we'd be a good fit together. Find out how you can create discomfort to your advantage. Also, I have a newsletter. Feel free to check that out. The link is in the show notes. And if you enjoyed this episode, I have plenty of others that are available to listen. I would also appreciate a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. That helps bring in more listeners. And if you found something that was useful for you, they'll probably find something useful for them. Thank you so much for joining me. And until next time.